So productive

It's been an incredibly productive day. I've been doing a lot of thinking about what type of shape I'm in and how I want my body to look and after months of laziness, well, I've decided to make a change about it. So I started running again today. It's been way to long and I'm in horrible shape, but it's a start. My goal is to lose somewhere in the neighborhood of 25 pounds. I also started doing some push-ups and sit-ups before I go to bed at night. It's starting out as a small amount; about 15 push-ups and 30 sit-ups. I want to give my body a chance to adjust to the changes in exercise before I really start to push myself. But after thinking about what I've done to my body since I stopped running cross country and track, well, I'm just a little ashamed. I used to be the 99th percentile athlete and now I can hardly run a mile and a half without feeling like I'm going to die. But it's going to change. 2 miles a day for this week and probably next week until I feel like I'm ready to increase that distance. I also need to alter my diet and I know that Michelle tried to help me with that, but I couldn't really stay committed to what we had talked about.

Besides my new workout plans, I managed to get all of my Christmas decorations up around the house. Now, I know it sounds like that's a big accomplishment, but it really isn't. I have a 4 foot fake tree (I prefer the real trees but can't really afford to purchase them) that I decorated with my meager supply of ornaments and wrapped some white lights on. I also decorated my back porch, which hangs over my garage, with three strands of multicolored lights. I actually prefer the multicolored ones to the whites. Not really sure why. Maybe it's because we get white lights all the time, so seeing white Christmas lights just really doesn't excite me. I despise the icicle lights that people hang off their gutters. Again, don't really know why, but I've never cared for them. I guess I put them in the same category as SUVs (the "everybody has one and they all look kind of stupid" category).

I moved all of the pots that Michelle left on the porch to the garage and plan on throwing them away on Thursday. I've never had much of a green thumb and those were her deal. I didn't mind having them up there, but I guess it doesn't really matter much to me to have plants on the back porch. If I had a real garden, well, it would probably be a different story, but I doubt the town home association will allow me to dig up a patch of the lawn to plant some veggies.

Tomorrow is going to be a regular old day: wake up at 6:30, run, shower, head to work, get home at 6, make a simple dinner, watch a movie and head to bed. Thursday probably won't alter much from that, mostly because there's not a whole lot to do during the week and most of my friends don't like to come out when they have to work tomorrow. Saturday is going to be a big day as Mizzou takes on Oklahoma for the Big 12 championship. I'm extremely nervous about it, as Oklahoma has a much stronger program and a history of coming up in big games. I don't think Mizzou has played a non-bowl game this late in the year for 40 or so years, so I'd have to say that Oklahoma has the experience factor on their side. It's also going to be my Aunt Peggy's birthday party, so I'll be attending that before I head out to a bar to watch the game.

Lastly, I mentioned in my last post that I went to the Cadillac Ranch last weekend and that it was a good time. I probably wasn't clear enough about that. It wasn't a good time because the Ranch offers great drink prices or has a mechanical bull or anything along those lines. It was a good time because my family was there and they are incredibly interesting people to hang out with. There was also an over-dancer (a guy who repeatedly busted out Michael Jackson moves to country music) and a shim (more commonly known as a she-male). The music there sucks. I can't stand country music and can't remember what they had on while I was there, except for the time they played ZZ Top. I'm not sure I can make the connection to ZZ Top and country line dancing, but hey, I don't have to. That's up for those line dancers to decide. So for those of you who were wondering why I said I enjoyed the Ranch (Bryan, I'm talking to you), well, there you have it.

Have a great night everyone.

Go Tigers

My alma mater is the number one ranked team in all of college football. If you were to have asked me about the likelihood of Mizzou being ranked number one before the college football season began, I believe that my answer would have been between slim & none. And yet, here we are with the Big 12 championship game on the line on Saturday and only Oklahoma standing between Mizzou and a shot at the national championship. I know that Mizzou lost to the Sooners earlier this season, but I'm guessing that this one is going to be different. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that Mizzou is going to win it all and everything is going to be excellent.

A few other things. One - Todd Sauerbrun, the Bronco's punter, has learned his lesson. Before the Bears game today, he told reporters that he wasn't afraid of kicking to Devin Hester. And it looked like everything was going according to Sauerbrun's plan before he punted it to Hester in the second quarter. Bam, just like Batman in the olden days, Hester was running it back to the endzone. So you'd figure that Sauerbrun would have realized that he shouldn't tempt fate and kick away from Hester like the rest of the league, only he didn't. After a great Bronco touchdown drive, he kicked off to Hester down the middle of the field and Hester burned them again. It doesn't make any sense to me. He's only scored 11 return touchdowns in 26 games.

Two - the Cadillac Ranch isn't a bad little place to go to on a Friday night. Of course, it's better when all of your family goes with you, but still, it was a good time.

I'm looking forward to Saturday. Caleb may be coming up for the game next weekend, so let's hope it's a happy occasion where we celebrate Mizzou's victory.

M - I - Z!

Two?

Yeah, I know. Two posts in one day. Normally it's lucky if I'm posting twice in a month, much less a week. But today, well, I guess I've got junk on my mind and I don't know where else to get rid of it all.

I've made a few resolutions for tomorrow. First of all, I'm not reading anything else written by exs. I went a little over a week between reads and I didn't really think about her much. Then I had a weak moment today and read her last couple of entries and I realized a couple of things. First, she's still angry with me and she still hell bent on blaming everything that went wrong between us on me. I'm okay with that, I think, because I know it's never all just one person's fault. There was effort made on from both of us and neither really took things the way they should. Some of my friends have been telling me how they really didn't like her and while I appreciate the fact that they kept that to themselves, I'm still taking the high road on this one. It's not appropriate to disrespect someone, whether they know it or not, and in this case, whether they're right or wrong, I don't want to hear it. I still wish her the best in everything she does. Us not being right together doesn't make me want her to go through anything bad. However, the real reason I don't think I should read her blog anymore is that she continues to hammer at me, talking about how I didn't appreciate the things she did for me and how I stopped being romantic and doing little things for her and it upset me. I feel like the efforts that I made went for nothing. Hell, I even got up on my day off to pick up her friend and drive her to her car. I could have said no and just walked away, but, well, you know I'm that sort of guy. So I guess it hurts to have someone you care for cast you in a negative light. I don't want to silence her or tell her how to act, so I'm just going to leave it at that.

Secondly, Matt & K-Moore might be moving up to the Chicago area sometime soon, so things aren't looking too badly. I can't wait for them to come up. If you two need a place to stay while you look for jobs/apartments/whatever, let me know. Good times.

Evidently tomorrow I'm going to watch an 80s cover band and then off to some other bar. I know that I'm not driving, so here's hoping I don't puke. I don't think there's a very big chance of that happening, but who knows with my cousin has planned.

Well, have a great day everyone.

Oh so Chuck

Some thoughts of the least staggering size:

1 - I started watching the show Chuck on NBC on Mondays. It's not bad. Some interesting plot lines, pretty straight forward stuff. The characters are interesting enough that I'll probably end up watching some more.

2 - I spiced up my usual mac & cheese dinner last night. Threw in some pepper, some creole spices and some Mexican pepper spice and it came out pretty damn good. Althought it's a bit spicier today than it was yesterday. Still, I'm somewhat proud of it. Now it's time to add meats and veggies and see what I can come up with.

3 - This is another reason in a list of long reasons why I'm a dork. Or nerd. Well, I'll give you two. First, I've been playing some Mah-jongg lately. Oye! Secondly, I was thinking about light speed (or ludicrous speed, if you prefer) last night as I was climbing into bed. What a strange thing to think about before sleeping right. Damn you Revenge of the Sith. Anyway, I was thinking about how they had to have a destination before they could leave to wherever they were going, but whenever they traveled in hyperspace, they always had the same coordinates. If this was true, wouldn't the ships all wreck into each other when they arrived. By definition, if I were to travel to x,y,z and you traveled to x,y,z, we would collide. Therefore, shouldn't the ships in those movies be travelling to slightly different locations. The points x and y might be the same, but z should be a little different. I can come to grips with the ships being able to stay together though hyperspace, but the coordinates thing needs to be investigated. After all, they say that behind good science fiction writing is good science.

It's been a good day thus far

As the title says, I've had a pretty good day thus far. Let's hit the highlights, only I won't go all crazy like the bumbling idiot that is Terry Bradshaw. Ok, I enjoy some Terry Bradshaw. He's not bad.

- Ultimate! That's right, I played for the first time since Austin (last year) and it was 7 on 7. I guess they play every Sunday at this park in the Wheaton area, which is cool. I was horrible (on the Dan Young scale), which I more or less expected. Still, it was nice to get out there and play. I'm way out of shape, which needs to be rectified immediately, and my passes weren't nearly as crisp as they used to be. The good news is that there's always next week. I don't know how long they'll play during the winter though. I'm guessing no, but only time will tell.

- The Bears actually won a game. Now, it was against the lowly Raiders (team motto: Mr. Davis taught us what sucking is all about) and Griese got hurt, but I was excited about two things. First, the defensive line looked stellar. There was pressure on the quarterbacks and running lanes were clogged. Urlacher is still aching with his back problems, which are probably worse than anyone is admitting, but the rest of the team looked good. Trumaine McBride even raised the level of his play and he's only a rookie. Secondly, the Bears actually took two shots deep, one of which was the game winning touchdown. Their offense has been pathetic all season and Ced the Sled looked his usual craptastic self. His line, in case you wanted to know: 29 carries, 76 yards, 1 td, 2.6 ypc. The o-line still needs to work on their blitz pickup and Benson needs to get his head out of his ass, but the receivers looked pretty good on a few plays. Flexy Rexy made a good throw on the deep ball, which is good and he even escaped a bit of pressure. He still needs to work on catching the snap (not a typical problem for quarterbacks, but what would I know about a quarterback? The Bears haven't had one ever) and his throw on the slant route should have been picked off. But they came out of the trace like state that they'd been playing in and the energy level was really good. I'm actually looking forward to watching them get killed in Seattle next week. Should be a good time.

- Lastly, dinner was fantastic. My mom made ribs on the grill with potatoes and salad. Good stuff. Way to step it up mom.

Well, I hope everything is going well for everyone else.

Shine

I can see it in your eyes, what I know in my heart is true.
That our love it has faded like the summer run through.
So we'll walk down the shoreline one last time together.
Feel the wind blow our wanderin' hearts like a feather
But who knows what's waiting in the wings of time.
Dry your eyes we gotta go where we can shine.
Don't be hiding in sorrow or clinging to the past,
With your beauty so precious and the season so fast.
No matter how cold the horizon appear
Or how far the first night when I held you near.
We've gotta rise from these ashes like a bird of flame.
Take my hand, we've gotta go where we can shine.
For all that we struggle for all we pretend,
It don't come down to nothing except love in the end.
And ours is a road that is strewn with goodbyes,
But as it unfolds, as it all unwinds,
Remember your soul is the one thing you just can't compromise.
Step out of the shadow, we're gonna go where we can shine.
We're gonna go where we can shine.
We're gonna go where we can shine.
Through the windows of midnight,
Moonfoam and silver.

David Gray

This song seems to strike a chord with me right now, although I'm not really sure why. I've probably listened to it five or six times today and early David Gray is nowhere near as polished as his current state. And it's probably because of that lack of polish that the power of the words mean so much more. You can tell he's incredibly Welsh (besides the way he puts his words together). It's a beautiful number and I strongly recommend it. It's off his first album, called A Century Ends.

A week I'd like to forget

This past week has been a never-ending downhill slide for me. I'm not really sure why, but it seems like everything is piling up on me and I'm sinking to the bottom. It's strange; for the last three months, I looked forward to Michelle leaving and moving on and I was sure that everything was for the best. And while I still think it was the right idea because we weren't getting along as a couple and just making each other miserable, now I actually find out what she really thinks of me and it's got me down. I've been dealing with a physical symptom from the negative vibes too: my left eye has been randomly twitching in the most annoying way. I guess I'm just not used to spending all of my time at home with no one else. Even when things were finished, Michelle was still here to talk to. Now she's moved on and I feel like I did when Daniel C. blamed me for breaking up his relationship with Blythe. And I'm not really sure why I do. I know that there was a lot of things that I didn't do as well as I should have and I've never been the most forthcoming person in the world, but it feels like Michelle's words have more power now than they did before. I know that I need to let it all go and move on and things will come out just fine, but right now it feels really hard for me. Plus I have a new boss at work and I'm tired of it. Hopefully playing some cards tomorrow night will help pick my spirits back up. Otherwise it's looking like it'll be a long November and that certain can't be a good thing. I hope everyone else is having a good one...